Week 2: As things progress ... some ideas for your viewing pleasure

It's been about two weeks and I've been bad and haven't posted sooner. It's been an interesting period of acclimation. That being said - I don't feel entirely at home yet.

Religious update:
I think that in the back of my mind, for some reason, I assumed (and probably partly due to my overwhelmingly pro-propagandistic first trip to Israel through Birthright) that I would just love love love Israel and fall in love. But Jerusalem is a hard place to be. For many reasons. It's obviously a place with a very high concentration of orthodox families. Although in almost every neighborhood there is a great number of seculars. This can be very overwhelming. I left Boston and the states with a great interest in continuing Jewish learning. I loved studying it, being a part of Jewish culture, everything about it I found fascinating. Here, it doesn't seem as though there are a lot of people interested in learning more about Judaism in a more liberal setting. If you grew up here, you know all you could want to know about Judaism. If you made aliyah (immigrated to Israel) then chances are that you would feel comfortable with your level of observance, and not necessarily searching for it. In America, a lot of liberal sects of Judaism exist to really just give jews a place to go, give them a community and an opportunity to meet other Jews. Here, there is no reason to do that for "liberal" jews. Everyone here is Jewish, and for many - they don't feel the need to go anywhere to express that. It's embedded into every aspect of their life. But I don't feel Israeli and comfortable with just existing in Jerusalem as a way to express my Judaism, and I don't yet feel comfortable in the world of orthodox Judaism. So my current response is to not explore any of it, and stay 10 feet away, for now. It's seems strange to me that I could be in Jerusalem, and feel so much more isolated as a Jew then I ever felt as one in Boston - buuuuut its still only been two weeks. We'll see how things progress.....

Everything else update:
There's this voice constantly playing in the back of my mind, don't forget why you came here (to create a body of short documentaries) - don't forget you should always be on the lookout for stories! I gave myself a rule: to wait 1 months before shooting anything. Take the first month to settle in, to acclimate, to feel comfortable enough to go up to a stranger, and start talking to them. But I can't help but think that time is moving very quickly - and by the end of my first month here, I will still feel uninspired, and have no idea where to go and what to create.

The program I am in also has an interesting dynamic. It's aimed at post grad kids, with a couple of people here in their late 20s. It has a very collegy feel to it. We're all in the same apartment building, we attend Hebrew class together, have lunch break at the same time, attend our classes in the afternoon together, go out together, etc. I remember working not even six months ago, thinking wow I cannot wait to go to Israel, I'm not sure if I am ready for this 9-5 world yet. But being back in this collegey world, in one where no one around me is on some fast track career path, is something that puts me in a somewhat culture shock. I have been waiting so long to do this program, and at times, I wonder what I am doing here. I am sure that these feelings are normal, and what many people have when they make any drastic location and life change. It's difficult to go from having a great job, right out of college, surrounded by people who are eager to move forward career wise, to a place where I'm struggling in language class, and not surrounded by anyone who wants to move fast toward anything. I think that in the back of my mind, I did ultimately decide to come to Israel for my career, to make me a better filmmaker and storyteller, and to fulfill this little travel bug I've caught. In doing that move, however, I feel so far removed from anything resembling ambition. I think I miss being busy in a work or school atmosphere, knowing that each hour I work feels another hour closer to a goal. I am quite busy here, taking the most intensive Hebrew class I could have imagined, studying hours and hours each night. But the work I am busy with here doesn't feel like it is moving me towards my goals, it kind of feels like I'm just starting over. We only have intensive Hebrew for a month, and then we start our internship. I am sure that once I get into that routine, I will feel much more in control of how I spend my time. Okay that is enough complaining about how every second is theoretically changing my entire life. It's a bit dramatic. I've outlined a couple of ideas that have intrigued me thus far. I'm not sure that ANY of them could be turned into documentaries, and I'm sure that the stories will present themselves in the forms of people, and not just things that interest me when talking about Israeli politics. But here they are below. I'd love to hear if any of them do anything for you.

1. In the book, "From Beirut to Jerusalem," (one of the best books I have read relating to the middle east) Tom Friedman talks about the incredible confusion of what Israel wants as a state. He mentions the three things that Israel wants to be, and would be in a perfect world, but has never really obtained simultaneously. In a perfect world, he says it would be a democratic nation, in the state of Israel, that remains a Jewish (theocracy, depending on how you view it) haven for Jews everywhere. In many of its problems through out history, It has only had two of the three. And if they only have two and not three, could they succeed? Could Israel live in another state, and be a jewish haven, and a democracy? Could it be in Israel, be a democracy, but not only cater to the Jewish people? This idea is of great interest to me, especially when it comes to the many political ideologies of what Israel is, and what it should be. Some people believe in separation of church and state for Israel, and are fighting so hard for equal rights between the arabs and jews. Others believe that G'd gave this land to the Jews, and that it must remain so (thus maintaining that Israel always must have more Jews than any other religious affiliation). It would be interesting to me to explore how people view these three aspects, and what they believe Israel's future is.

2. Haredi/Ultra Orthodox vs. Secular: The two groups is especially of interest to me when it comes to serving in the IDF (Israeli Defense Forces). Everyone in Israel has to serve in the IDF. You can however, be exempt from all forms of service for religious reasons. And to go even further, if for religious reasons, you choose not to partake in society by holding a job, and supporting your family, the government will support you. This is true for many ultra orthodox families, who are supported by the government and choose to devote all of their time to Torah and Talmud study. This does of course anger many seculars in Israel. It seems to anger them that they not only have to serve in army when others are exempt, but that their taxes support them. I read an interesting piece one about the balance between these two groups in Israel. The idea that if you are very traditional, you of course believe it is right to live your life according to the torah, and in the case of some people, one belief is that one of the ways that the messiah would come, is if everyone obeyed shabbos, and lived by the torah, etc. You get the idea. If someone dedicates their life to Judaic study, they must on some level believe that it is the only way to live. That everyone should do the same. But they are being supported by people who do not live by the Torah, people that work on Shabbat, people that break almost every mitzvah in the book. And on the other end of the seculars, it angers them that they support these people. But, it holds in question, if none of these ultra orthodox existed, there would far less zionists. There would be less of a place for traditional Jewish values to thrive. What information would be lost and what would remain? So while these two groups disgree and anger each other, there is a certain balance, and a certain respect they continue to hold. Whether or not this idea is true, I think it would be interesting to juxtapose different people's viewpoints of eachother.

3. Education and Linguistics: Israeli education is aparently a very hot topic to discuss. They barely teach the history of Israel in the classroom, because it is extremely difficult for them to know how to teach it. For example, when you bring up the creation of the state of Israel for the Jewish people in 1948, do you say it was conquered from the palestinians, or do you say it was claimed? Even in teaching Americans in their 20s, who are visiting Israel, it is difficult for people to convey the history of Israel, without being biased. When we discuss things in class, everyone, even at the age of 22 and 23, people come with this strong idea of what they think is true. It's impossible to even talk about. I think in class the other day, when discussing the UN partition of Israel, some asked, in 1947, what is the goal of the Arabs with this plan? Someone answered, to kill all the jews? I'm not positive how this idea could be turned into something, but it intrigued me all the same...

4. As I think about how I want to string the short pieces together, I think it would be great to have a same set of questions I ask everyone in one place - supermarket, on the street, etc. This could be thought of as a man on the street. It would be great to interject people's answers inbetween the pieces, as they become relevant. I would relate this to in a book, when a new chapter begins, and an author will insert a poem, short transcript, or something unrelated to the actual content, that helps introduce what you are about to read.

5. IDF Soldiers. I feel like there has been a lot of things done on IDF soldiers, and this maybe is something that is only interesting to Americans. But I think it is also so interesting to take americans view on war and service, and how appauled I know so many people would be if a draft was ever reinstated. With that audience in mind, it could be interesting to do something informative on either IDF service or soldiers, or even what it is like for young people after they have completed their mandatory service. I'm sure there are many extremists who are against whatever political power is currently instated in the Israeli Knesset, and what it is like for them to serve.

So there are just a few ideas, some of them are just interesting things, not necessarily possible for the documentary format. But as I said my original intent for the blog was to create a forum for my ideas and footage, here is step one. I'd love your thoughts!

Arrival and Day 1

My trip here was long. After flying from LA to NY, I took about a 12 hour hiatus before flying from New York to Brussels, and then finally, after what was supposed to be a 12 hour layover, flying Brussels to Tel Aviv.

Over the next five months, I am living in shared apartments in Israel. I will be learning Hebrew, taking classes in Israeli politics, history and culture, and interning, at what looks to be at this point, at MEMRI (Middle Eastern Media Research Institute). I'll be using these classes and this internship to jump start my documentary work. My blog will be my experiences, my thoughts, and most importantly, a forum for much of my raw footage - where I hope people will comment on their thoughts - and how they think it can be used in the final product(s).

My first sense of how "different" Israel would be hit me at the airport...not even in Tel Aviv, but in Brussels. In the screening process for check-in for most flights to Israel, they conduct a pre-interview, to gather some information not just about why you are entering the country, but your background, your interests, etc. They aim to find out as much about your past so they can track what one's reasons for entering Israel might be, and what you will be doing while in the country. During this, I was tired, without sleep, and as I typically do when I speak to people, I was rolling my eyes, and looking all around. At every moment that my eyes strayed even the slightest, her head sharply turned, trying at every moment to catch everywhere my eyes went. Her looks were almost frightening, as she vehemently stayed with me, almost uncomfortably.

I had always maintained that when people asked me, "Isn't it scary there?" that I felt safer here than I ever felt in L.A., New York or Boston. That there are policeman everywhere, that I have never felt crime around the corner, or that something was about to happen to me. But that comes at a price, a constant infiltration of your privacy - and I guess I must be thankful for that. It made me wonder, for the first time, however, as a young Jewish white girl, with a place set up for her, going to Israel for all the right reasons, with all the paperwork intact and in hand, what it must be like for someone else. What it must be like for a young Palestinian girl, returning to her home in Israel, going home for all the right reasons in her mind, having to go through an obscene screening process, to perhaps only be interrogated. I am not one, not will I ever be, so I cannot say. In the end though, I feel safe, so I must be thankful?

I had two senses of being in Israel on day 1. The first, as I mentioned above, was political. The second, religious. In Boston, (even amongst some Orthodox communities) I feel must more religious. I feel by simply wearing a skirt on a Saturday, waking up early, I am a Jew. Whether or not this is true, I feel Jewish, and I feel that people can see it on me. I am different. Here - in the city of Jerusalem, where many ultra-orthodox communities are only minutes away by foot, at times I feel naked, under-dressed. I am no longer, "the religious one." Supermarkets and malls that are filled with males in Yarmulkes and women in long skirts and covered hair. While I am sure that the women and men of Jerusalem see their fair share of what they would call the unobservant, I still felt slightly watched. Maybe it is the knowledge that I am an American in a foreign country, and maybe the do not care in the least. But even in the first 24 hours, I feel it. And I wonder how this will continue to manifest itself over the coming months.

In sharing the two ways Israel hit me in the face, I have shared what my two goals of growth are to be over the coming months. Political and Religious. I came here to continue my personal study of Middle Eastern politics, in an effort to experiment in the field of political documentaries, and see how I can become more well-rounded in international media and politics. On the other end, I cannot deny my continued curiosity for both Israel and Judaism. Sometimes I am not sure where one ends, and the latter begins, but I am sure these coming months will tell. On the religious front, I am reluctant to write much, as I assume, for some reason, that you are least interested in that part of me as well.

So day 1 seems successful. Except for the part that the reason I am writing this is because it is 6am, and I did not go to sleep last night....for now we shall ignore the physical needs ...